What does constructive and destructive behaviour towards the self look like?
Scenario 1:
I wake up feeling groggy. There are house chores to do. There is still some paperwork I need to catch up on. I got to cook, got to eat. I need to do some workout but I really don’t feel like it. And I feel ‘ugh’. I think to myself ‘what’s the point?’ My mind reminds me of all my recent stress. Although I cannot quite name why, I feel bad, worse as the day goes by. I feel like lashing out at my loved ones for no apparent reason. I feel cranky. I decide to just avoid everything, binge-watch Netflix and eat a lot of junk food. My mood worsens. I remain in a slum, arguing with people who try to help. I am surprised at this nasty side of myself. This mood carries on with me the next day too.
Scenario 2:
I wake up feeling groggy. There are house chores to do. There is still some paperwork I need to catch up on. I got to cook, got to eat. I need to do some workout but I really don’t feel like it. And I feel ‘ugh.’ “What’s the point” crosses my mind but I set the intention to try. I remind myself to show compassion for my suffering, even when I don’t understand it. I remind myself of my commitment to try as much as I can. I do some Pilates. I manage to do some paperwork. I still don’t feel too good emotionally but I try to do things that I know help to make me feel good. I tell my loved ones I need space to sort myself out. I go for a walk without music, letting myself feel some sunshine. I breathe in and out a few times. Suddenly, I feel better.
All the emotions, and feelings we carry in our bodies show up when they think is time. It may not make sense right away why we feel what we feel. But what we choose to do with the feelings is what makes the difference. You can choose to be constructive towards yourself or you can be destructive. The easy option may end up being a rather difficult one. While a difficult option may end up being an easy one. It depends on whether you are looking at longer-term or shorter-term gains.
We have been wired to look for immediate pleasures, but at what cost?
We live with the choices we make. The choices start with simple steps.
There are certain things in life not in our control, but certain things in life are within our control. The actions we take are within our control.
Our actions or lack of, affect how we feel and the person we become.
May you choose an action that serves you.
Reflective Question
What are some constructive perspectives and actions you take on regularly?
What are some destructive thoughts and patterns you notice in yourself regularly?
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